Okay so some of you may know that I found out a few months ago that I was pregnant. It was a pretty big surprise to us and the first few days were very stressful and emotional. I will sum up the stresses for you... I have no insurance right now, we are moving all of our stuff into storage which means we will be homeless when we get home this summer, oh and summer...we have no idea what we will be doing in the summer, or where for that matter. And then there is the problem of finding a doctor in Spain, being six months pregnant while backpacking around Europe...and the list goes on. So basically you can imagine why we would be a little stressed.
After the shock wore off I realized I was having a baby, something I've been looking forward to for years. As a matter of fact I have a huge stash of cute baby items I have been collecting over the years for my future children. Some may call that psycho, I call it prepared. As we started telling our family members, they too were nothing but excited and assured us that everything would work out despite our not so ideal timing. Thus starting the excitement and planning phase of this "roller coaster" of emotions.
Then about a week and a half ago I started noticing signs of a potential miscarriage. I wanted to see a doctor right away to see if my suspicions were right. Scott had to take a final and I wanted to get in asap so I went to the ultrasound alone, where the very nice nurse informed me that the baby did not have a heartbeat and that I did not have a viable pregnancy. Naturally we were very sad and disappointed to hear the news. I went through some pretty rough days but I really do know that Heavenly Father has a plan for me and my family and everything works out how it is supposed to.
I debated sharing this story since so many of you did not even know that I was pregnant, but the other day I was looking at a friends blog where she was talking about her amazing dad (and I can attest that yes Lauren's dad is an awesome man). You are probably thinking, wait what...what does this have to do with the miscarriage story. Well when I read Lauren's post I could not help but think about my sweet dad and how amazing he had been to call and check up on me more than any other person had. Well that very day that I was thinking about him I got the most amazing "anonymous" letter in the mail from heaven and I just had to share....
"Letter From Heaven
Dear Mom and Dad,
Sorry for the quick departure. I feel bad that I've made many of you sad. However, the timing just wasn't right so I called back and asked God if he could arrange it so I could delay my arrival for awhile. He agreed to let me come back... so I am here on the bench, hanging out here in heaven. It's really pretty cool here.
I should be ready to join you when the time is right. God knows when that is and I really trust him. I hope you do too. He let me pick my future earthly parents and I chose you two. I know that you will be the best parents that a child could ever ask for. I'll be a good kid and I am sure that we will love each other a lot. Again... sorry that you are going through a few rough days. I'll make it up to you when I arrive next time.
OBTW (...see, I'm already practicing the text message thing... how old do I have to be to get a cell phone??? ... oh, we can talk about that later.) .... I took a quick peek at Grandma and Grandpa's. They are so cute... I can't wait to meet them in person and let them spoil me. I couldn't believe all the Christmas decorations. Grandma must really like the holiday season. How does Grandpa put up with it? He must really be patient. I can't wait to help re-arrange all of the decorations on the lower part of the tree. I hope that they are sturdy... because I might break a few.
Well... don't be too sad. I'll be back before you know it. Enjoy the time in Spain, and have a great holiday season.
Love...
Minnow... (that's what Grandpa will call me, cause I'll be a baby Fish ... he thinks he's so funny... I do too.)
P.S. I love you. See you soon."
So thanks Dad, I am one lucky girl to have you as my Dad!
12 comments:
Kirby-you are so wonderful. Your dad is so right, you and Scott will be the MOST amazing parents. There is a very special little minnow waiting to come to this earth and he will be soooo lucky. I love you (and Fish)and you guys have been in our thoughts and prayers daily. Miss you tons
Holy smokes! I have tears running down my cheeks and I'm not a crier. Your babies are not only going to have great parents but AMAZING grandparents. It's describable how much our heavenly father loves us and is looking out for us. Thanks for sharing this experience. It's little things like this that put life into perspective.
That is the sweetest thing He is so amazing I am so grateful for him and everything he does for us. I am so happy that you posted it. We love you guys so much and we are going to miss you while you are gone I know you are going to have so much fun see you soon.
Kirby, I am totally crying. What an amazing, amazing dad. I had no idea you went through all of this. You are SO lucky to have such amazing parents and family that are such a support to you (and Scott). Thanks for sharing.
Your dad is the most adorable man ever! So sorry about the pregnancy, but when the time comes I know that you are going to be the greatest parents to your little one. We need to catch up soon, though I've lost my voice temporarily with this cold I've got so it may have to be a little later. Love ya.
I'm so sorry. No one should have to go through this. I can't even imagine how hard it must be. You are one strong girl. Amazing.
We love you guys. What a great Dad and a sweet letter. You are in our thoughts.
Chels & Mike
Kirby, you just have to make a new mom cry!! That was the cutest letter ever. I'm sorry you had a miscarriage. I can relate, my first one was an ectopic pregnancy, the baby was in my tube so naturally they had to take the egg out. The Lord is mindful and like that letter said, I'll make it up to you when I arrive. It's definitely worth the wait. I hope you enjoy the Christmas season and good luck in Europe. Hang in there, you and Scott will get through it.
Hey, that's a really sweet letter. It was fun catching up in Vegas! I hope ya'll have a good semester in Spain, and you'll have to give me a call when you get back to Phoenix.
Talk about a roller coaster... just reading it gave me so many different emotions. Your dad's letter couldn't have said it better (aren't Dads the best). You are amazing Kirby and have such a great outlook.
BTW, when do you take off to Spain? Can't wait to hear all about it.
Your dad's letter made me cry : ( How awesome is he to write something like that? I never really thought of it from that perspective but from his words, it makes perfect sense!
What a great letter! Your Dad must be such a neat man. (Very creative too!) Thanks for sharing it. We are going to miss you and Scott a ton when you are in Spain! It makes me sad! We look forward to being with you on Christmas. Love you!
Very sweet- you made me cry, thanks for sharing and I wish you the best with everything!
Post a Comment